Update June 28, 2011

Well D.A.V. came and left with a truck full of goodies and we gained one slab of concrete in the garage. I would like to rearrange the garage to make paths to be able to get to stuff easier than hurdling over things and risk avalanches or hurting myself or my husbands self...then move what stuff in the house that I can't get rid of just yet nor put away just yet because I need room to be able to build places for stuff to go...THEN move it back into the house (uh yeah that's the plan right?). You and I both know it won't work unless I stay motivated and then when I am done building places to put stuff and run out of places to put stuff I will still have a garage full of stuff I can't part with...and have to re-evaluate what I have and get rid of more stuff and hopefully by then I wouldn't have accumulated anything more than what I already have today...but that's probably doubtful...
I do have to say the one thing that is good about this depression is that I have no motivation to do anything including but not limited to shopping XD...only good thing about it...bad part of it is that I am not motivated to do anything including cleaning so I just sit here with my mess without building it higher though so that's good I am stable at least not adding to my mess right? Anyways.
I am trying to get things in swing so we can get ready for a baby before we get the baby in the making...so we are ready long before he or she gets here...anyways...
Also I want to note that my horrible mess maybe something no one else think its as bad as I think...I am my worst critic and I have to tell you readers this so you don't get the wrong idea bout me...my hoard isn't filthy its clean I can't stand filth I just have stuff...and its clutter...too much stuff not enough storage space or display shelves or something...the floors are swept and mopped more often than anything...and dishes and laundry do get done...if my husband has to do it he does it...which lately my funk I am in he has been the only one doing anything around here...I feel bad about it but what can I do about it? I lost another baby and I am really just in a funk and I will get through it like I always do...and I am planning on snapping out of it...since my depression is not chemically induced (why pills don't help me) its circumstances and I just gotta work through the problems...there is nothing I can do to change what happened...I just gotta learn to live with the facts that these things happened...and move forward...accepting them....its not easy...but I hear it can be done...so I am going to try very hard...cause pills just make me worse I think...
Anyway...talk to you all later
Sincerely,
Rabeka Jo